Saturday, January 31, 2009

I love you more

'cause I'm bigger.

Fuck this band.

Because they swear too much.
It's an obvious ploy.
And irresponsible.

Maybe freedom's just another word

for no one left to kill.

Wednesday, January 28, 2009

When people ask what I been doing.

I tell them I been pootin'.

Sunday, January 25, 2009

And I forget stuff.

The Wrestler - 6.5/10. Oddly cliche and generic, save for a few genuinely sweet character moments. It mostly serves as an elegy, a fantasy wish-fulfillment of wayward professions whose time was once and may be again. It makes a hero out of someone too stubborn to not fuck up, which the movie hides from us for the longest time because he's such a damn sweetheart, now isn't he.

What'll it be, mac.

Superman II: The Richard Donner Cut - 7/10. In brief: Richard Donner made Superman I and II back-to-back, but was taken off after the release of Superman I for whatever reason and was replaced by Richard Lester, when little of the film remained to be filmed, making it campier, which the original director derided.

It's been a long time since I've seen the original release as anything more than wallpaper, so forgive me if I'm mistaken. On the whole, the movie seemed to be neutered, to lack the comedy and camp that made Superman II better than Superman I in the first place. It's fantastic being able to see more footage of Christopher Reeve's Clark Kent, whom I adore, and Margot Kidder's Lois Lane becomes sort of adorable, which isn't a word I would have used to describe Margot Kidder's Lois Lane. Having Brando there is better than not, and the movie makes a stab at the end for a more dramatic conclusion to the Superman and Lois Lane relationship, but then bites itself in the ass by trying to erase that with what remains the campiest aspect of the Superman movies. Between the two versions of the movie, both of which are great in their own right, there's probably one that's only slightly better.

Friday, January 23, 2009


You got me all interested in your pootin'.

Tuesday, January 20, 2009

Latest news.

Obama raises hand, lifts a nation. (link to t-shirt)



Let me begin

with some sentimental appeals to our national myths; assorted cliches coined by the state; the ideological shorthand meant to sweep your private doubts away.

What would that say about me

if I got offended.

Monday, January 19, 2009

If the devil looked just like you.

In the Valley of Elah - 8/10. Tommy Lee Jones plays Batman to his son's murder, and finds out his son was an ounce a dick. I would have preferred the thing was more about 'finding out who the members of your family really are' outside of the context of who they are to you, rather than 'what war'll do to you, man' but Paul Haggis. Otherwise terse and Jones is fantastic.

White folk.

30 Days of Night - 7.5/10. Better than its source material, which couldn't fit tension into its 80 pages. Could have been tighter and slower and better and more Thing-esque, but I'll take it fine.


Mamma Mia! - 2/10. What a magnificently awful movie.


My Bloody Valentine 3-D - 6/10. I didn't know who the killer was until the end and it was in 3-d.

Saturday, January 17, 2009

On evenings

when we got together to listen to music and challenge each other in wild games of hearts.


Gran Torino - 8.5/10. Manages to be exactly what you expect and not at all. Surprisingly sweet, wholly affecting, hilarious and, if it is his last movie, I couldn't imagine one more fitting. Above all else, despite everything the movie says, all the lines it tries to cross, it is one of the most family-friendly movies of last year and one of its very best.

Friday, January 16, 2009


Only 991 years left.

Just abandoned.

Synecdoche, NY - 8/10. Hey, man, that was pretty good.


Jam-packed full of ideas, good ideas, about art and artists and I guess regular motherfuckers, too, but who gives a shit about them. Charlie Kaufman's flaws in the past have been sacrificing a certain amount of character development for the sake of his ideas, which is a sort of half-assed criticism, really, and it's still there in this one, though lesser. He managed to cram in all of his ideas and have his most fleshed-out character so far, even if it falls short of understanding itself. It shows how smart Charlie Kaufman is that he ends up making that part of the point of the movie anyway. I'm waiting for the day I can talk about Charlie Kaufman movies without talking about Charlie Kaufman.

Thursday, January 15, 2009

Like taking out stitches

with a fork.

An expensive

way of knowing.

Wednesday, January 14, 2009

Every artist

wants to be a different artist.

Tuesday, January 13, 2009

Done right by what's done right by you.

It Happened One Night - 6.5/10. Fascinating to watch simply for seeing where the screwball comedy conventions came from. The rapid-fire dialogue isn't as fast as it would become, nor is it as clever and Clark Gable practices the mannerisms that Cary Grant would later steal. Fun to watch as a specimen, but not entirely memorable or that well thought out.

Monday, January 12, 2009


You fell in.


my dialogue.


without a reason.


Miller's Crossing - 8/10. I watched this a long time ago and had no affection for it and then i watched it again and it was all right there.

Sunday, January 11, 2009

Fat Larry's

is now an Indian Restaurant.


with virginity.

Saturday, January 10, 2009

Baby, I've got to go.

Baby, I've got to know.

Thursday, January 8, 2009

Marion Cobretti.

Commando - 6/10. I've been holding this up for years to be some sort of 'Cobra'-level event, but it only manages to be half as bad as that one is. I watched it on AMC and apparently I missed him cutting off the top of some guy's head? so it's probably a point lower than it should be.

Tuesday, January 6, 2009

Taylor Swift.

I would wait for marriage because that's what you fucking want.

Taylor Swift.

I am serious in fucking love with this bitch.

Dear Girl at Fat Larry's,

I put a dollar in the tip jar, but you didn't see me do it. I thought about taking it out and waiting until you saw me, but I decided against it. That would be fake, and I want our relationship to be real.

Monday, January 5, 2009

Your boy.

Dear Zachary: A Letter To A Son About His Father - 8/10.

Sunday, January 4, 2009

Stop inviting walls

into wide open spaces.

Dear Girl at Fat Larry's,

You asked me what I wanted.
I wanted to say 'you.'
I got a 99 cent burger instead.

Friday, January 2, 2009


Suck more dick.

Robert Redford sings the blues.

The Curious Case Of Benjamin Button - 6.5/10. Shy of affecting. You'll have to understand I'm a hard ass nigga.

Enclosed, you'll find your mother.

My Favorite Wife - 6/10. Grant and Dunne are more than fine, but the movie simply doesn't aim for any high notes.

Thursday, January 1, 2009

Hey, guys, I didn't make this pizza.

It was delivered by Pizza Hut.