Wednesday, April 25, 2012

Need is the excuse

for every betrayal of rational thought.

If you ever decide to play a real human being,

I'd come watch your act.

Tuesday, April 24, 2012

We asked the captain

what course of action he proposed to take toward a beast so large, terrifying, and unpredictable. He hesitated to answer, and then said judiciously: "I think I shall praise it."

[His] favorite comics are the ones

where the joke is on the reader.

Whatever happened

to Johnny Internets?

Friday, April 20, 2012

Somewhere, in our darkest night,

we made up the story of a man who will never let us down.

Thursday, April 19, 2012


macht frei.

Wednesday, April 18, 2012


for sinning.

Tuesday, April 17, 2012



Friday, April 13, 2012

The production and distribution

of meaning.

Growing up


What a strange way to die.

What a strange way to never be.

To say things

and not mean them.


in a Yankee Candle store.

I didn't too much

want much.

Make it a part of you,

then forget it.

The mind

that has no mind.

Hara hachi bu.

Eating until you are 80% full.

And it wasn't very interesting,

and it wasn't very fun,
but man,
did he fight for her.

I was described

1200 years ago.

It is according to opinions

that we suffer.


are improvements.

She was a dull person,

but a sensational invitation to make babies.

How nice –

to feel nothing, and still get full credit for being alive.

I think you guys are going to have to come up with a lot of wonderful new lies,

or people just aren't going to want to go on living.

Wednesday, April 11, 2012

The growing metaphysical void

at the center of my bedroom ceiling.

Saturday, April 7, 2012

Don't give a fuck,

'cause motherfucker, that's what I do.