Three O'Clock High - 2.5/5
It makes me wonder why there aren't more high school movies based on old Westerns. It's an easy metaphor. Guys. Guys. It's fun and inconsequential. At times crudely directed and slapped together while occasionally – mistakenly? – managing a surprisingly well-done scene.
Sunday, November 1, 2015
Science the shit out of this.
The Martian - 4.5/5
Entertaining as fuuuuuck. It's the end of the world but you don't have to be such a sad fucking sack about it. That's its trick. And what a beautiful, simple, infinitely reusable trick. Everybody else, get on board.
Entertaining as fuuuuuck. It's the end of the world but you don't have to be such a sad fucking sack about it. That's its trick. And what a beautiful, simple, infinitely reusable trick. Everybody else, get on board.
You can't be happy all the time.
Escape From Tomorrow - 3/5
Surprisingly linear given the Oceans 11-level finagling that went into the making. Not quite the psychedelic freakout I thought it'd be – just a middle-aged man freaking out about middle-aged thoughts and feelings. Its theme is a good one (and a just-about-perfect one to be told while secretly filming at Disneyland): you can't be happy all the time. But I may have perhaps wanted that to be more directed towards the place than the people. I may have perhaps wanted this to be a more damning screed against Mouse-sized politics. It's not that, nearly at all, but it's still a wonder to watch.
Surprisingly linear given the Oceans 11-level finagling that went into the making. Not quite the psychedelic freakout I thought it'd be – just a middle-aged man freaking out about middle-aged thoughts and feelings. Its theme is a good one (and a just-about-perfect one to be told while secretly filming at Disneyland): you can't be happy all the time. But I may have perhaps wanted that to be more directed towards the place than the people. I may have perhaps wanted this to be a more damning screed against Mouse-sized politics. It's not that, nearly at all, but it's still a wonder to watch.
Fuck as many different women as you can.
Deceptive Practice: The Mysteries and Mentors of Ricky Jay – 2/5
Perhaps the best subject of a documentary is not a man whose entire career is based on his ability to keep secrets. He's created an aura about himself, like any good magician, and like any good magician, he never breaks the spell. The only bit of lifting up the veil is a last-minute reveal that he has a wife. Okay, thanks. It's best when they talk to the people wowed by him – or to him about the people he's wowed by. I can't describe exactly why other than to say there's an energy, a palpable afterimage left behind by people who've been magnetized. Dai Vernon, a mentor of Ricky's, is a better subject.
Perhaps the best subject of a documentary is not a man whose entire career is based on his ability to keep secrets. He's created an aura about himself, like any good magician, and like any good magician, he never breaks the spell. The only bit of lifting up the veil is a last-minute reveal that he has a wife. Okay, thanks. It's best when they talk to the people wowed by him – or to him about the people he's wowed by. I can't describe exactly why other than to say there's an energy, a palpable afterimage left behind by people who've been magnetized. Dai Vernon, a mentor of Ricky's, is a better subject.
Just because it's a love story doesn't mean it can't have a decapitation or two.
Wes Craven's New Nightmare - 2.5/5
It's got ideas! Different ones! It makes the legend of Freddy bigger... and then does nothing new with that information. It gets small again. Manageable. Brought down to size. Maybe my love for 'Freddy's Revenge' is because there's a subtext to Freddy that rarely (in the three movies I've seen) gets pulled to the surface – that Freddy is scarier as a sexual predator than as a slasher. He hurts people in their heads. But there seems to be a reluctance to take him to that point – and for obvious reasons, sure. I'd rather dress up as iconic-dude-with-claw-hand than iconic-dude-who-touches-little-kids-with-it. There's a great pedophile movie to be made... and shit, it could've been made here. The 'love story between Nancy and Freddy' is a nice idea, except that Freddy spends most of his time on the son. And there could have been a clear implication that the love story was actually between Freddy and that little kid. And that's a creep factor that'd be nice to have. I mean, the purpose of these movies should be to give you bad dreams.
It's got ideas! Different ones! It makes the legend of Freddy bigger... and then does nothing new with that information. It gets small again. Manageable. Brought down to size. Maybe my love for 'Freddy's Revenge' is because there's a subtext to Freddy that rarely (in the three movies I've seen) gets pulled to the surface – that Freddy is scarier as a sexual predator than as a slasher. He hurts people in their heads. But there seems to be a reluctance to take him to that point – and for obvious reasons, sure. I'd rather dress up as iconic-dude-with-claw-hand than iconic-dude-who-touches-little-kids-with-it. There's a great pedophile movie to be made... and shit, it could've been made here. The 'love story between Nancy and Freddy' is a nice idea, except that Freddy spends most of his time on the son. And there could have been a clear implication that the love story was actually between Freddy and that little kid. And that's a creep factor that'd be nice to have. I mean, the purpose of these movies should be to give you bad dreams.
The name... is Dumass.
Duma - 2/5
I don't recall how this ended up on my Netflix DVD queue. My sister says she didn't do it. Anyway, I forced myself to watch it. Fun fact! The part of Duma was played by 6 different cheetahs! There's an entire other movie not shown of us staring at the mom's gradual deterioration as as she thinks her son is dead. No, mom, he's on an inspirational quest, lol.
I don't recall how this ended up on my Netflix DVD queue. My sister says she didn't do it. Anyway, I forced myself to watch it. Fun fact! The part of Duma was played by 6 different cheetahs! There's an entire other movie not shown of us staring at the mom's gradual deterioration as as she thinks her son is dead. No, mom, he's on an inspirational quest, lol.
Friday, September 25, 2015
Monday, September 21, 2015
Saturday, August 29, 2015
Monday, August 17, 2015
Sunday, August 16, 2015
Monday, August 10, 2015
Monday, June 22, 2015
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